Professor Milton Bernard Abraham...Noel!

Friday the 13th was a night we will never forget, the night we became parents, the night we set off on a journey that formed the rest of out lives. We decided we weren't very rebellious kids and once again our lives were not like disney movies. The solution to this problem: Get a Hamster...a secret hamster, and so our journey begins. That day after school we drove to every Petco around in search for the perfect buddy. Rowdy helped us. Then we met a little girl who told her mom that we were her new friends. Her name was Scout. Her mom looked concerned for us. Then finally in east Peoria we found him...or her. It was a Winter White Russian Dwarf Hamster. He was fat. We asked for the fattest one she had. the lady thought we were going to eat him. then she asked if we were 18. we said "sure are" and she said she would let it slide as long as our parents didnt care. we said "of course they dont mind." Little did she know that our parents were just as clueless as her. So Professor Milton Bernard Abraham has been living in our closets for 4 months now. In that time he has developed a tumor (dont worry it went away), survived malnutrition(hes a lover and a fighter), and suffered a gender crisis. We thought it was a boy. then korey looked up hamster anatomy and found that he was a she. Koreys mom was the first to find out. he screamed when she opened the bathroom door with a vacuum cleaner running. then emily's dad was the next to find him. he threw him in a shoe and laughed. Its a wonder he didnt find out sooner seeing as we talked about him all the time in front of him. he even layed down next to him and watched tv with him and didnt even notice. we have planned his funeral . when he dies were all gonna meet out in the country and korey will bring a shovel. he is a man.